My father was a romantic. He loved women. He was always falling in love. He told me that age did not affect his feelings, in fact only made them stronger as women became more unattainable as he grew older. He never broke any hearts or any marriages, but he lavished affection on many women. Somehow, his infatuations were never inappropriate. He taught me to expect love even in old age. As I grow older and my love for my husband increases daily, I understand what he meant!

Today is January 5, 2017, and my father would have been ninety years of age! My husband and I are celebrating his birthday!

Today is New Year's Eve and it's already 2017 in Australia! In honor of my father, whose birthday is January 5, I put on a CD of Slim Dusty (Dinki-Di Aussies), one of his favorite artists. I was raised listening mostly to classical music, but my father expanded my horizons with Kitaro and other music, including Slim's. I have continued to be more diverse in my musical tastes.

Although my father was only one half Irish on his mother's side and English on his father's side, he identified with being Irish. His Irish ancestors were from County Cork. My father was raised Catholic and supported independence from Britain for all Ireland, including Northern Ireland. He disliked England and the English based on this Irish identity and his far left wing anti-imperialist views. As extreme as were his opinions, I respect him for sticking to them his entire life. He never wavered. Loyalty is an important quality and, despite the many good-natured arguments with his friends and family, he was steadfast in his world view. I admire him for that quality.

When my brother and I reunited with my father in 1989, after a 10-year rift due to my parents' divorce, we had some fun! My dad became especially close to my brother, Des. From 2005 until my father's passing in 2009, I was battling illness and was not in touch with my dad. I am comforted that he and my brother were so close. I know my talented, successful, well-travelled, brother, his accomplished wife, Miriam, their adult children Ayelet and Noa, as well as Miriam's extended family, did all they could to support my dad until the end. My father also had some dear friends, who stood by him through thick and thin. It's a comfort to know they were at his side until his last days and gave him a send-off he would have appreciated in a true Irish wake.

My father often told a romantic story about his only trip to China. Near the end of World War 2, he lied about his age, putting it up, and joined the Australian Navy. He went on some ship (a minesweeper?) to China, but when they arrived there, the war had ended. He fell hopelessly in love with everything Chinese, a romance that lasted a lifetime. By his accounts, he fell in love with a Chinese girl who he wanted to take back with him to Australia. The girl did not return with him, but I believe he was in love with her all his life. My father's determination in his old age to live in Cabramatta, which consists of a mostly Chinese immigrant community, was undoubtedly related to his love of China! Good for him!

In his fifties, my father began working in the wine industry in Sydney, Australia. At the time of our reunion in 1989, I had for some time not been drinking alcohol and had intended never to drink it again. My father encouraged me to drink moderately in social situations. He saw that after I had drunk a glass of wine I was more relaxed and outgoing. I was able to sample many good, and not so good, Australian wines under his guidance. I was never as interested as he was in wine, but it did do the trick for a while. Now I am resolving again not to drink alcohol, but secretly I am pleased that I shared my father's love of the good grape for a time.

Although my mother was considered the musician in the family, due to her ability to play classics on the piano, my father was also musically gifted. I believe he even played in a band before he married. He liked 1940-50's pop music and my brother, and I would often have sing-alongs when we were in the car with him. My brother is gifted musically, and no doubt inherited this ability from both his parents! Later on in his life, my father's interest in Eastern cultures, especially all thing Chinese, lead him to more exotic music that he shared with me. He broadened my tastes considerably!

My father was good at hospitality. He was usually the one to prepare any big holiday meals. He had a gift with people, knowing just how to put them at ease, and he never forgot a birthday. These skills were put to good use when he worked in the wine industry in Australia. He organized elaborate wine dinners and managed to make every participant feel special. He would prepare for weeks but give the impression he had just started work on the event the night before!

My father struggled for most of his life with tobacco addiction. He would try to give up, fall off the wagon, and disappoint himself. I was sympathetic, so my father confided in me how difficult it was. Nearer the end of his life, he had difficulty breathing and did not get a definite diagnosis. He was alarmed enough to give up smoking eventually. I admire him for this victory! He also gave up alcohol near the end of his life. That was hard as he enjoyed a drink with friends. Again, I am proud of him for having the strength of character to put his health first.

My father had a gift for gardening. From the gardens we had when I was growing up in suburbia to the balcony plants he cultivated near the end of his life; they were all beautiful and fruitful. He performed miracles and expressed himself through his love of plants.

In 1989 I was ill and, when I began to recover, I decided to reestablish contact with my father after a ten-year rift caused by my parents' divorce. The reunion went well, but my Dad noticed I had become withdrawn. He integrated me into his network of friends, most of whom he had met through the wine industry in Australia. He was skillful at bringing out my real personality and rekindling my social skills. I am grateful to this day for his support during this difficult period.

Some of my father's family tree.

My father was incredibly smart. I am of a generation who understood that being clever had little to do with education, an idea which seems to have disappeared. He was a wizard with computers and was completely self-taught. He passed on this passion to my brother Des and this heavily influenced Des's career choices. His mind was active right up until the end of his life. I miss the intellectual exchanges with him!

My name is Paula Tretkoff. I am Desmond H. Beazley

Paula Tretkoff

8 years ago

My name is Paula Tretkoff. I am Desmond H. Beazley's daughter. My father's greatest gift to me was to teach me how to be happy with what I already have in my life. He lived in humble circumstances but always found the riches in what was around him and loved the people he met every day. I loved him!

Des was a great friend to have! He always asked the hard questions, poked fun and teased mercilessly, but in the end found ways to motivate me to think about what I really want for myself and out of life. I will miss him and our entertaining lunches. My condolences to his family and especially to Des Jr. motivated me to think about what I really want for myself and out of life. I will miss him and our entertaining lunches. My condolences to his family and especially to Des Jr.

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We have known Des for many years having met while working at the ANZ Wine club. He will be much missed and our sympathy goes out to his family. Rest in peace, Des

Des inspired me to run the Celeste Seniors Group and created our website. I feel sad at the loss of Des and will miss his special humour.

I will miss the special email transmissions - that were usually quite funny and broke up a busy and stressful day. I have lost the the special moments of long philosophical conversations about today's world - politics, etc. Whilst I will miss these things - Des has etched a place in my heart and I will cherish the privilege of having Des as a sage and humorous friend. Des I wish you well on this latest journey of yours, although you would argue there sin't one. My deepest condolences to the family. Love you Des.

I will miss the special email transmissions - that were usually quite funny and broke up a busy and stressful day. I have lost the the special moments of long philosophical conversations about today's world - politics, etc. Whilst I will miss these things - Des has etched a place in my heart and I will cherish the privilege of having Des as a sage and humorous friend. Des I wish you well on this latest journey of yours, although you would argue there sin't one. My deepest condolences to the family. Love you Des.

i knew Des since 2000

I knew Des since 2000. Since the very first moment we clicked.. He was a real inspiration for me. Because of him I am in this position at Cabramatta Community Centre. He will be sorely missed by all of us. Thank you Des for sharing your beautiful life. You will be in our hearts forever. Have a good trip - your friend Julio.